Hi (:
My name is Chair and I rock.
Seventeen candles on the 28th September '09. I ♥ cocktails, cocaine, and clubbing.

PARAMORE
is the bomb.
you know you love me
xoxo


put a more detailed profile here. (:




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I WILL MOVE ON, I PROMISE ♥ at 5:26 AM


MOVING ON, its not just about LOVE its also about my BROKEN FRIENDSHIP. thinking of all these. YES, it hurts. VERY BADLY but i know no point avoiding. it had already become a fact. HMM... i have been a LOVE FAILURE. i did not have a long relationship with N. NOW that i sat down and think again, i realize it wasn't all N's fault. I shouldn't put all the blame on N perhaps it was my fault too. I AM NOT GOOD ENOUGH and that's why i couldn't keep N by myside. but its alright... its already a history now. N has a new girlfriend and tmrw will be their first month anniversary. CONGRATULATIONS N, i am happy for you. i won't hate you anymore. though we cannot be like last time, have normal chats but we're still friends. thankyou for taking the initiative to add me back in facebook though i removed N first. so sorry. that time i acted too childish. BUT now i am awake. i should face instead of avoid. i will not let you hold me back anymore. cause i know letting you go, what i actually need is my DETERMINATION. my FIRST step was deleting 1300 sms of yours to me and indirectly i am already deleting our memories off. and ABOUT my friendship. YES, maybe she's true i am a MUMMY GIRL. mostly what my mum says i will just listen to her. ITS bcause i know how much my mum loves me. i want to be a good kid. I DON'T wanna be a rebellious kid. i just wanna be the BEST kid ever though i know i couldn't be one. I AM NOT HER NUMBER ONE BUT MUM IS ALWAYS MY NUMBER ONE. she gave me all her love. she prepared me the best meals the whole day long. yes, sometimes i also cannot stand her for some reasons but if i really think of all she had did for me. i am so not willing to be angry of her for long. just one night i was very sad that i woke up in the middle of the night and cried. tears flow like rain pours. AFTER crying alone i felt much more better and so i went back to bed. LOL. wait out of topic.
* tut tut * friendship. what is the definition of friends? friend is a person you know well and regard with affection and trust. LAST TIME, i use to trust C but now i can't :(
perhaps someone is doing something unnecessary to just make the relationship between C and I getting from bad to WORST! but i know if C really trust me all these won't happen. haha. it might be also bcause i don't look trustworthy at all. hehe. my theory...
I DONT NEED A THOUSAND FRIENDS TO BE FAMOUS, BUT I JUST NEED ONE FRIEND WHICH IS ALWAYS TRUE AND CARING.
I AM LACK OF LOVE, PLEASE GIVE ME YOUR LOVE ♥
I WILL MOVE ON!
p/s : ILOVEYOU, my BIG-MAC-GOR

♥ JOEYLAUTNER1827


DEPRESSION ♥ at 6:37 AM


THIS IS WHERE THE STORY BEGINS, i have a friend name C. She was once a very bestfriend of mine but lately i realize that all along this friendship between me and her was nothing at all. She hurt me so badly with no sign of regrets. this pain in my heart is so internal that till this very moment it is still painful. this incident took place on tuesday which is the 17th of AUGUST. When school dismiss i was standing at the school gate with her and suddenly we overcome to this topic about good and bad girls? and then we had a small debate between each other, and ended up she said something very harsh to me. ' JOEYTANG do you think you're a very good girl? '
i said at least i am not that bad. i admit that i am not THAT GOOD but at least i really don't use vulgar words for no reason like i used to be in primary. i don't bully others but others bully me. and is this what she meant by naughty? ohh, god. i thought to really forget what she said MAYBE she didn't really mean it as she's always lidat. but unfortunately another friend of mine name J told me smtg which really made me so mad and from that moment i knew that this friendship between C and I had come to an end. J told me that C told her that day that she's very pissed off with me and she even insult me. she said i'm very stupid bcause i always don't understand their conversation. COME ON, from the beginning i also don't understand wert its like since the beginning of the year till now. and why must you say all these NOW? don't you know me well enough. i told J i am real hurt and J told me she'll try to tell C to apologize but it seems that C is not another heartless person. she told J if you continue telling me about joeytang we will not be friends too. I understand the consequences so i told J not to ask C about it anymore even if she apologize to me now. it meant nothing at all. ITS JUST AM EMPTY APOLOGY. she seemed to forgotten who was the ONE being there for her when she was once left alone with no other friends. she forgotten who was the one always accompanying her during recess. she forgotten all these bcause she has many friends now so she will kicked me out from her life. MAYBE this is her lifestyle. SHE's so famous how possible will she keep me as her bff?
someone which is so ugly and so unknown. haha. life is a reality show.
WHEN SOMEONE NEEDS YOU, they'll love you and protect you but once you're someone which come to no use YOU'll be erase off from her friends list and that's the end. BYE BYE.
i thought i could really forgive her but i know this time it is just off my limits i really can't. i even cried for her in class. how stupid. luckily my ROBOT TEARS WIPER ' WONGSUKYEIN '
is always there to wipe my tears off and soo trying to console me in a fierce way and YUJIE consoling me by singing with weird voices yet still very adorable.
PEOPLE THANKYOU FOR BEING THERE FOR ME, and as my friends please be REAL.
THANKYOU. :) Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened ♥
thankyou for telling me the truth J i am now AWAKE and will not be a toy of hers anymore!

♥JOEYLAUTNER1827


HAPPY BIRTHDAY DESKMATE-KU ♥ at 7:54 AM

ILOVETHISPICTUREOFYOURS! SWEET!
TANGYUJIE :)
SHE'S NOW OFFICIALLY 15. She is a super sweet girl sitting beside of me for two longg years, pity her cause i have always been a big bully XD for you've been a very important person to me let me tell you this ILOVEYOU! don't misunderstand anything i am just loving her as my deskmate and a very very close soulmate as well. YOU've been a very helpful girl. with no doubts you'll help me with my homeworks. you'll teach me maths as i'm really bad in it and not to be forgotten the time we always sing together to THE BIGGER BULLY SOOYEEYOKE. hahahaha. * please don't tell her or i'll be so so dead * YUJIE. thankyou so so much. i always pour my feelings to you and you're forced to listen. sitting beside me is tough isn't it? haha. sometimes i am so cheerful and sometimes i'm freaking emo. so scary i know. maybe next year we will not be in the same class anymore though we always wish to be in the same class when we chit chat. hee. if we happen to be in the same class next year. please promise me to sit with me. CANYOU? time flies and how i wish i could turn back the clock which is wayyy far away from PMR. so that we don't needa face form4 so soon and so we don't needa seperate too. sorry if i've hurt your feelings. hope that you could forgive me. pleaseeeee.
ONCE AND FOR ALL,
HAPPY FIFTEEN BIRTHDAY YUJIE, hope that you will love the gift i gave you WO AI NI ♥


SINGLE IS LOVELY ♥ at 7:47 AM


HE IS HOT. I LOVE HIM. TOO GORGEOUS FROM THE HEAD TO THE TOE ♥

Now that i realize being single is actually fun. FIRST, we don't needa be worry that our partner will flirt with others. SECOND, talking to others you don't needa be worry that your partner will feel unhappy for it. THIRD when your parents suspect you in a relationship. you don't needa be worry at all bcause you know the best that YOU're SINGLE. maybe all these reasons i made it up myself just because i don't wanna get into a relationship?
MY LIFE...
EXAM just ended not long ago and during this exam period i really struggle through all the time, its not because i am over tension over studies but its bcause of my mum. i really don't understand her that much lately. HOW can i describe my feelings now? disappointed? YES, i am. i've been studying very hard for the past few weeks and yet she doesn't seems to see my hardwork. she has been criticizing me quite often too. the problem is what have i done wrong? at least an hour for me to watch tv is that too over? i have not been texting for the past two weeks and just a little bit of entertainment for me, is that wrong? ON FRIDAY NIGHT, i cried. she yelled at me saying that i'm stubborn? come on mum. for the whole week of exam i didn't listen to songs already. and bcause i know saturday i'm having sivics and seni so i listen to the song WHILE i study and is that why you needa yell at me? what about my feelings? have you ever consider about it? i am tired of all these. you seldom smile to me lately so am i. we're always sleeping on the same bed yet i feel that we're just like strangers. you changed a lot, mum. what's going on? i am trying so so hard to be a good kid. but why can't you feel it? why can't you learn to see everything in a better perspective? i told my brother about it, even HE doesn't understand me. i know mum have her own consequences acting like that lately. but i think she really don't know she've hurt me. i just need more love, staying at home is so hard for me. whenever there's a cold war between you and dad. i am always the one stuck in the middle. you tell me stuffs about dad, dad tell me stuffs about you. i really feel so tired to listen TO BOTH MY PARENT's complain. they're just freaking me out. and i told everything to my deskmate, YUJIE :)
all my problems i'll tell her. she's MY SOULMATE. she understands me. always try to make me feel better. sing songs and make me laugh. sometimes i will also tell my HONEYMOON geh, tapi kan i don't wanna bother her so much leh. bcause she's equally stressed out sometimes. i don't wanna see her stress more over me XD so better tell, yujie enough dy. anyway i wanna say this to MY BELOVED HONEYMOON. THANKYOU SO SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING ♥
and there's few pictures edited just for you :)

♥ JOEY1827